5 Love Languages

If you haven’t heard of the 5 love languages, a book by Gary Chapman, which you can find at his website, https://www.5lovelanguages.com/, then you should visit that link. Having our immediate needs of food, water and shelter met is not the only thing we need to get rid of anxiety.

Here’s my take on the 5 love languages

Quality Time – spending time with loved ones is a great way to show you care about them and to feel cared about. If the person is someone you feel relaxed around, quality time with this person will help ease your worries. Quality time is anything you do with that person that requires interacting.

Gifts – Some people really enjoying giving and receiving gifts. A gift can serve as a reminder that person is cared about. If you have anxiety, and you feel loved when you receive a gift, put that gift out on display to remind yourself that you are secure in someone’s love.

Words of Affirmation – Phrases like “I like you”, “you worked really hard on that and it shows”, “what you’re feeling is valid,”or even “that didn’t go as planned but I like how you handled the outcome” can ease anxiety. Start doling out the genuine compliments, you know, the ones you think but don’t necessarily mention. Others are more likely to return the joy after they receive words of affirmation.

Touch – Holding someone’s hand, patting their back, a quick hug, and even a fist bump are great ways to show you care through touch. If you are someone who feels more secure/loved when touched, don’t be afraid to say so. “I’m a hugger. If it’s cool with you, I’d like a hug” let’s people know your desire and asks for their permission. If they say no, it’s not a rejection of you, it’s a view into their comfort levels. Give them some words of affirmation that show you still like them. You might just get that hug.

Acts of Services – Simply taking out the trash or running a load of dishes can ease anxiety and increase feelings of security. If a roommate/partner does the dishes and you don’t have to, it can reduce the laundry list of chores hanging over your anxious head. Sometimes, the way to reduce your own anxiety is to help reduce others’ by doing the dishes.

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